Hmm, marvelous stuff.
This is Adam and Joe here on XFM.
You just heard The Feeling by Sone.
Oh no, I got it wrong.
It's Sone by The Feeling.
You idiot.
You idiot.
You're out of touch.
I'm out of time.
I know that it's the second single from the London-based quintet signed to Island Records' self-described soft rock archaeologist.
The band are out to make easy listening hip.
Well, come on, haven't people been trying to do that for about 25 years?
To make easy listening hip?
Yeah.
I mean, it was hip, wasn't it?
About eight years ago?
It was hip in the 70s.
Yeah, it can't come round again.
Er, what's the band called?
er, sewn.
No, the feeling!
I don't get that at all.
The feeling, you should give up trying to make Easy Listening hip.
Yeah.
Or give it a rest for another five or six years, then it'll be its turn again.
And before that you heard editors, er, as Zane Lowe would say, with Munich, and erm, is Munich, would that be the theme tune to the film?
No.
I went to see Munich this week.
Did you?
We can talk about it a bit later.
Oh, I'm excited.
It's going to be hard to get funny chat out of Munich.
Really?
Because it's quite a depressing spectacle.
It's a bit dour.
a little bit deux.
But no, it hasn't got anything to do with the song.
It's just another of those happy coincidences.
Yeah.
They should pop it in there, though.
They should, over the closing credits.
You'll speak when you're spoken to.
You know, speaking of movie music, our ditty's in the dock this week towards the end of the second hour of the show is going to be songs from John Landis films.
Yeah, that's right.
Man, I dug up the worst song I think has ever been played ever over the closing credits of any film I think is on a John Landis film.
really yeah that's exciting i wonder if it's the same one that i dug up well i bent the rules a little bit because i was just having i didn't bend the rules technically because it's just any old song that's been in a john landersville that's an awful lot of songs and he's uh he's notorious for being a needle drop director right needle drop being when you just call them yeah a needle drop soundtrack is when you just have nothing but hit records on a film no incidental music he was one of the first people to do it though him and uh he was on american werewolf american werewolf bad moon rising yeah it was certainly sort of stunt bit of music
before that people used to write proper music didn't they for the whole film that's right original scores yeah have you seen v for vendetta diegetic what's diegetic if you're a film somewhere out there there will be a media studies film studies people diegetic is the term isn't it diegetic and non-diegetic sound what's cornish talking about it sounds like some sort of uh bowel disease is that right i think diegetic sound is sound within the film are you making non-diegetic no somebody text in if you're a film student
Tell me that's right.
Film's due in- Digetic and non-digetic.
Have you seen- Anyway, FIFA Vendetta.
No, not yet.
I was going to go to the premiere on Wednesday, but it was too rainy.
Too rainy!
I don't want to go to the premiere.
Too rainy!
Sorry, Con, it's too rainy.
Anyway, we've got lots to talk about this week, as well as those things.
We've got TV shows that I've been watching.
We've been watching a lot of TV this week.
That's important, man.
Yeah.
It's very good for your eyes.
It makes them bigger.
Exactly.
And healthier.
Stronger.
It tends to improve the brain and make you more intelligent, I find.
We've also got a competition for you, celebrity regression therapy.
Very easy one this week.
And we got great prizes.
This week, uh, we've still got- have we still got This Life box sets of series one?
We've still got Ghost in the Shell part two, Innocence on DVD to give away.
And our special prize this week is a pass to an all-day horror film festival next weekend.
That's a good prize.
So if you hate the show and you love horror, it's the perfect prize because you needn't listen to us.
You can just go and sit in the Prince Charles all day next Saturday and watch, uh, 12 Hours of Non-Stop Horror.
That's the kind of thing we used to do.
Yeah, man, I might go There's good stuff on and we'll tell you more about that in in a second.
What a packed show Anyway, as well as all that we've got great music and here's a bit more of it.
This is the killers
What is he saying on the radio in the background at the end?
Yeah, we talked about this before, didn't we?
It sounds very 80s, that one, doesn't it?
Sounds like 80s Bowie.
Very mannered delivery, yeah, almost like psychedelic version.
On the radio in the background.
Hey, thanks to everybody who's texted in about diegetic and non-diegetic sound.
This is a sophisticated program for sophisticated people.
Zayn wouldn't have those kinds of words on his show, would he?
He has trouble getting more than one syllable out.
As for Justin E. Collins, he's got more hair than brains.
he's a genius he is a genius lee collins yeah in a strange way uh but yeah so what i was exactly right diegetic sound is uh sound that the characters in the film can hear non-diegetic guy is the sound that only we at home in the cinema can can hear or at home because lots of movies are watched at home or on your mobile hey joe yeah imagine if you had a scene
where the whole point of the scene was that the sound went from diegetic to non-diegetic.
Oh my god.
Okay?
How would you do that?
Or the other way round.
Hey, uh, yeah, man, there is a film that does that.
There must be loads.
Yeah, no, there's a film that does it really cleverly.
I tell you what it is as well.
Oh, it's a French one.
called Look At Me.
You've seen a French film?
Yeah, I saw a French film, man.
Oh, it was tiring on the eyes.
What kind of freak are you?
No, they explained what they were saying in words on the bottom.
Yeah.
And it was wicked.
It's called Look At Me.
Oh, it's a brilliant film.
Is that a modern film?
French film.
If you're sophisticated enough to be interested in diegetic and non-diegetic sound, then rent out Look At Me and there's a brilliant use of diegetic and non-diegetic sound at the end.
Anyway, come on, we're losing our less sophisticated listeners.
Well, OK, let's get them back by talking about some TV.
Charlie Brooker.
This is good TV.
We often slag off bad TV on this show.
But I very much enjoyed a couple of shows that I watched this week.
All sort of in one way or another something to do with the media or celebrity or whatever.
There was Charlie Brooker's show Screenwipe.
Yeah, this is on BBC 4.
Now Charlie Brooker might be familiar to some of you as one of the writers on Nathan Barley.
He and Chris Morris wrote that show.
He also writes a column in the Guardian Guide, doesn't he?
Yeah, called Screen Burn.
Screen Burn, right.
Yeah, but his show's called Screen Wipe.
Okay.
He's cornered the market in phrases beginning with screen.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Wash is the only one he's got left.
Screen Buttocks.
Yeah, he's got that one left, you're right.
That's down corrected.
so his show is on BBC4 which is a good channel isn't it again a channel for thinking people like this show this is the kind of BBC4 of XFM as it were yeah do you know what i'm saying yeah good i just made a fart sound to keep less sophisticated people tuned in excellent um so yeah i'm recommending that if you haven't caught it already you check out Charlie Brooker's show Screen Wipe
which is on Thursdays, BBC 4, 10.30pm.
It gets repeated a fair bit, so you should check it out.
But it's basically Charlie kind of ranting about various aspects of TV in rather an entertaining way, and illustrating a lot of his rants with clips and that kind of thing.
Not dissimilar, in fact, to a lot of stuff that Victor Louis Smith used to do on TV.
Also very entertainingly.
But anyway, it's a good show.
And did you sh- you didn't happen to see on Sky 1 a show called Celebrities on Heat?
No, I didn't happen to see that.
Hosted by Julie Burchill?
No.
Why is Julie Burchill?
Oh no, here we go.
No, I read about this.
This is- this was Judy Burchill's analysis of Heat magazine and how it's co- contributed to culture in Britain and all that.
It's the latest in a very, very long line of shows that attempt to kind of add an intellectual gloss to basically it being a TV version of Heat.
Heat's glossy enough, it can't take an intellectual gloss as well.
I know, exactly.
It'll be sodden.
Basically all these shows just want to have their cake and eat it.
So they present an hour-long diatribe from someone like Julie Burchell, who's frightening.
She's got a funny voice.
She's got a funny voice and she's frightening looking.
And she basically just goes on about, you know, what's happened to modern culture.
We're all obsessed with celebrities.
You just think, God, not this, not this argument again.
You know, you've heard it pretty much before.
And then they wheel out the same people over and over again.
The guy that edits Heat, Mark Frith.
This TV critic, Brian Hyland.
Have you ever seen him?
He sort of juts his chin out and he seems to be staring into the air, seems to be fascinated by something he's just seen in the air.
I have no, don't know about him.
Oh man, I'm very familiar with all these people.
But it's just, do you not reckon that there's only so many times you can do the same show about why people are obsessed with celebrities?
Yeah.
Let's talk to some celebrities about it.
Are there not?
No one is obsessed with celebrities anymore, are they?
I don't think anyone cares anymore.
Really?
Yeah.
I don't know.
Burchall was sort of saying, I love it, it's great, I can't stop reading these magazines, but why are we obsessed with them and they're so stupid?
I just don't think that's really good enough.
No.
My way out is simply not to watch it.
That's a good idea.
I didn't even think of that.
One way out is to play Ghost Recon Advanced Warfighter on the 360.
Nonstop for 48 hours.
Excellent.
Well, let's play some more music right now.
Here's a free play.
This is the B-52s with Planet Claire.
You're listening to Adam and Jo on XFS.
Come on, that's the B-52s with Planet Claire.
This is Adam and Joe on XFM.
We'll be back with competition time very shortly.
Oh, I haven't even got a chance to say anything.
Go on, say something quickly.
It's ad time.
Nutties!
Nutties!
XFM.
Love music.
Love XFM.
Well, I'd say that they were Britain's biggest band right now.
They are called the Kaiser Chiefs.
The Kaiser Chiefs.
And that one was called Oh My God.
I can't believe it.
If you like them, you can buy it in a record shop.
Nice bit of facts there, Joe.
Thanks, man.
This is Adam and Joe on XFM, London's 104.9.
We were talking earlier about diegetic and non-diegetic sound, and we've had quite a lot of texts from media students.
Er, saying we're right, yeah, that, er, non-diag- I can't believe we're still banging on about this.
Come on.
It really hurts my mouth to say the words.
It's difficult, isn't it?
Yeah, but anyway, basically there are good examples of it in Gross Point Blank where John Cusack apparently, er, goes into a shop.
So he's outside the shop and the soundtrack's playing, you know, the, the, the non-diagetic sound is playing.
He goes into the shop and the soundtrack becomes the pipe music in the shop.
Right.
An example of switching from diagetic to non-diagetic.
Yeah, that must happen quite a lot.
And then a more overt satirical use of that would be when sometimes you hear a music stab and you assume it's non-diegetic, then the camera pans... See, you're using it like a pro now.
You didn't know what these words meant at the beginning of the show.
No, it's an amazing new world for me.
Then the camera pans to the left and you see the orchestra actually in the room playing the soundtrack that you think... Oh, yes.
You've got it, Buxton.
We've taught you something.
Thank you very much.
You've done one of your media modules.
Thank you very much.
I was also taught something.
He's not Brian Hyland.
Brian Hyland sang itsy-witsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini.
I just remembered.
Ian Hyland is the TV critic who's always popping up in shows about celebrity to go on about how annoying celebrities are.
And he's now more famous, I would say, than a lot of the irritating people he's talking about.
And a great deal more irritating too.
Anyway, thanks to Toby in London for correcting Adam on that.
Thanks very much.
Always happy to be corrected.
It's very nearly competition time.
It's time for us to give something back.
To you, the listeners.
In this case, DVDs.
Um, so if you'd like some DVDs, then... Celebrity regression coming up.
Celebrity, exactly.
What you've done said just there.
Shall we play some more music?
It's the mighty Moz.
But you have killed me!
There's a brilliant article in Mojo Magazine this month, Interview with the Mighty Moz.
If you're a Moz fan, you should check it out.
You'll probably know that already if you're a Morrissey fan.
Speaking of, oh, have you got more to say?
No, just that it was one of those rare occasions that you feel enriched by reading something in a magazine.
Yeah.
Do you know what I mean?
Well, there's a similar thing in Empire Magazine, which I often slag off for just being a sort of DVD catalogue.
Yeah.
But this month, they've got a really thorough interview with Harrison Ford.
Oh, yeah.
And it's funny.
Excellent.
He's a Harrison board.
He's a grumpy, grumpy man.
And he's got some funny things to say.
I meant to bring it in, but I'll bring it in next week.
Oh, that would be good.
OK, I think it is competition time.
You could win a DVD or tickets to a show.
You just never know.
So sharpen up your brain and get ready to play.
And it's time to play Celebrity Regression.
We haven't played this for a few weeks, so if you need refreshing, this is an actual medical psychotherapy experiment where we put Adam under.
Hypnotically, he enters the brain and films of a film star.
Simply by hearing him relive these films from the point of view of the star, you have to tell us who the star is and what the films are.
Does that make sense?
I think that does make sense.
Can I just say as well before I go under?
Yeah.
You say whatever you want, man, because you might never come back
that after this, Joe, you're going to be selecting the next song we play.
It's going to be your free play.
Oh, is it?
OK, thanks.
So just so you can intro it while I'm under my deep hypnotic trance.
OK.
Shall we get going?
Deep hypnotic... Deep hypnotic trance.
OK, the number, you might want to make a note of this, 0-8-7-1-2-2-2-1-0-4-9.
0-8-7-1-2-2-2-1-0-4-9.
And if you get this right, you can basically have your pick of any of the amazing prizes we've already talked about.
Passes to the horror film festival.
There's three, Adam.
Passes to the horror film festival.
Four, in fact.
More tickets to see Pete and Dud come again.
Ghost in the Shell DVDs, This Life DVDs.
You know, whoever you are, whatever kind of wants you have.
Are you fading me out, like at the Oscars?
No, sorry.
I played the wrong bit of music.
Yeah, no, you're right.
OK, let's put Adam under now.
So here we go. 08712221049.
regression bell rings everyone take a deep breath just try and clear your minds blank your minds whatever's hassling your brain
And we're going to regress Adam all the way back now into a better life, a more glamorous life, the life of somebody sexy, somebody clever, somebody successful.
That's right, a film star, someone better than you or I could ever be, however hard we try.
We don't know whether it's a man or a woman, but Adam is now going to enter their body through their body passage.
He is now inside the star, and he is now inside their first film.
When he opens his eyes, he will see with the star's eyes, and he will see what's happening in the film!
Oh, I'm in a tiny kitchen in an apartment in New York.
Normally the kitchen is very neat, everything just so, the way I like it.
Couth, you know, but not today.
Today there is an uncouth man in my kitchen, a dirty man, a ciggie-smoking man.
He drinks coffee, he eats meat, he's a dirty, coffee-drinking, ciggie-smoking, meat man and I wish he were gone, but I can't make him leave.
If I did, my very apartment would be jeopardized.
What's more, despite the fact that we are so very different, I can feel an attraction growing for this dirty man.
And as soon as he gets even more dirty, this apartment will be filled with uncouth-roughty!
So that's the first star in the first film.
0871221 049, you might have guessed it already.
Let's, uh, put Adam into the second film of the same star.
Adam, wake up, tell us what you can see.
Oh, I'm in a bar.
A rather insulubrious place I've been brought to by a journalist.
Unfortunately, he's not a brave, crusading, truth-uncovering journalist.
He's a dirty journalist!
a cynical journalist, a drunkie journalist.
Not like me at all.
I'm cooth.
I love cooth.
I love the cooth in any way.
Mmm.
You could call me a cooth expert, which is why I'm here.
Because the fellow that me and my dirty journalist companion are traveling with is supposed to be the king of cooth.
But hilariously, he's anything but!
As we speak, he's there on the dance floor, with a beer and a ciggy dancing lewdly with ladies in a raincoat.
I don't call that cooth hilarious!
That's film number two, 0-8-7-1-triple-two-one-o-four-nine.
If you know which film star and which movie Adam's been regressed into, here comes the third and final film.
Adam, wake up.
Tell us what you can see.
I'm in a big Scottish castle now, on a warm summer night.
Flaming torches shine as hordes of incredibly posh people arrive to share my special day.
No, I'm not Madonna, but I am comparably ludicrous.
And no, I am not ludicrous either.
I am the romantic focus of this yarn.
Despite the fact that I'm so flaky, I've just promised to spend the rest of my life with a fellow I met a few weeks ago unless I meet someone with nicer hair and a better line in bumbling bull crap.
Ooh!
hello what's the commotion over there someone's had a little too much to drink maybe or died maybe no matter nothing's going to spoil my plot twist i mean wedding
So there we go listeners, Adam is now under until somebody calls 08712221049 and correctly guesses the three movies he was witnessing and the star whose head he was occupying 08712221049.
Call now and in the meantime we'll leave you with the latest news from Britain's housing estates courtesy of Sway.
This is Flow Fashion.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that was Sway with flow fashion.
Adam is still regressed after these adverts will come back and hopefully bring him back to life.
Love music Love XFM
This is Adam and Jo on a Saturday afternoon.
You join us in the midst of Adam's regression.
He's been regressed into the mind and films of a very famous celebrity.
And who's the lovely lady what is on the telephone?
Well, I reckon she's got it right.
It's Anthony.
Kate.
Hello, Kate.
Hello.
How are you, Kate?
I'm fine, thanks.
Good.
If you just, you know, keep your voice down and nice and calm because you could damage Adam's tiny brain.
So are you fairly confident?
I'm confident about the celebrity, but I was calling when Adam was doing the second one, and I got a bit confused.
Well, you know, you've sacrificed a complete answer maybe for getting in there first, which is a fair trade-off.
So before you tell us the star, give us an idea of what films you think they are.
Well, the first film is Green Card.
Dero Depardieu is the smoking meat eater.
Smoking meat eater in the kitchen?
The second film is where I got confused because I phoned, and I thought you said the bloke had a beer,
and she played a journalist in two films, I think, Michael and Groundhog Day.
You're good.
I'm a really big Annie McDowell fan.
Really?
There's a little clue to who you think it might be.
Oh, sorry.
Don't worry, that's just a little clue, and what was the final film?
The third film was for weddings and funerals.
A classic.
Well, I don't like the film.
You don't like it?
No.
Well, this is very interesting.
Well, let's first of all have you say the name of the star and see if Adam wakes up.
Annie McDowell.
I was sort of half awake already, as Kate mentioned it earlier on, but very good deduction.
Are you like an Olympic athlete?
If this was an Olympic sport, you would be representing Britain.
You sound like some kind of movie brainiac!
No, not at all.
I just really like Andy McDowall.
Do you?
And why don't you like her in Four Weddings, standing in the rain?
You think it's a terrible film?
I thought you would have thought that for an Andy McDowall fan... You'd be kicked out of the country for saying that.
If you're, you know, because there can't be that many... The government will fly you to Guantanamo Bay and torture you.
isn't that is that not considered to be the peak of McDowell's career well she's very charming in it but um the film itself isn't very good oh shocking what about Michael you're not telling us Michael is better than four weddings and a funeral the film about the angel again she's very charming in it um the film isn't very good
Yeah, but Green Card is a classic.
I just love that, yeah.
It is a good film.
It's directed by someone proper, isn't it?
I always forget.
Peter Weir, that's right, he's a proper director.
It is an enjoyable film, that's my favourite.
Actually, no, Groundhog Day, come on, you can't really beat Groundhog Day.
That's a classic, that's a proper classic.
It's an absolute smash.
Hey, what do you do for a living, Kate?
You sound a bit brainier than... No, I write children's books.
Do you?
What's your... are they published?
um i wonder if i've ever read any of them there's a teen one so i don't think oh really what are they there's a series of them no actually there's only one but there's another one coming out later really what's it called the one tests in love tests in love i'm gonna get that
No, don't.
Why not?
Why not?
Are you threatened by Danny Minogue and Madonna?
Isn't Danny Minogue?
It's Kylie Minogue.
No, is it Kylie?
I thought I read Danny's doing children's books as well.
No, I think it's called The Impossible Princess.
Really?
Sooner or later, Danny does everything that Kylie does.
Yeah, she'll be churning out the children's books.
Listen, Kate, thanks so much for your call.
What about prizes?
What would you like to see?
Did you hear all the prizes?
I might have been phoning.
got so many it's going to take ages but this life complete series one ghost in the shell lovely there you go this life series one hey thanks for calling cake well done for being so clever yeah and good luck with the books i'm sure um i'll be buying them for for my children at some stage uh yeah there you go that's celebrity regression therapy for this week very it was quite easy wasn't it i'm gonna buy that and bring it in next week yeah go on then we didn't get her surname will you find out no it'll be okay as long as you've got the title of the book okay then
Well done, that was very good regression.
How did that feel Adam?
Obviously you were unconscious through the whole thing.
It felt good to get it out of my system.
Yeah, but what about the regression?
What?
Thank you very much.
That's very nice of you.
Orson with No Tomorrow.
Tessa, who just won our competition.
Your book sounds brilliant.
No, Kate.
Kate.
Kate.
Sorry, Kate.
Sorry.
The heron of the book's called Tessa.
It sounds great.
The Amazon reviews are raving about it.
Five stars.
A brilliant book.
Wow, this book is just amazing.
Follows the romance of two teens who might not look perfect, but their romance blossoms.
This book is brilliant.
Buy it and read it fast.
That's great, isn't it?
Wow.
We've got talented authors phoning us.
Yeah, Tessa in love, there you go.
She's called Kate Levan.
And what was your joke, Joe?
Our husband's called Joe LeTaxi.
Nice!
We're coming up towards the end of the first hour here on a Saturday afternoon at XFM.
We've got so much more to talk about in the second hour.
Yeah, we're going to do a text competition and we're going to do Ditties in the Dock to name but two things.
And we've still got loads of prizes to give away.
Tickets to the Fright Fest horror event next Saturday.
Tickets to see Pete and Dud come again.
More DVDs, Ghost in the Shell DVDs.
So stay tuned.
Absolutely.
We'll be right back.
Love music.
Love XFM.
Someone clean the needle.
Just remember to dust the records before we play them down.
See, that one's filthy.
That was my fault, I just dribbled over it a little bit.
Well, come on.
That was Gnarls Barkley with Crazy.
That's going to be a big hit, isn't it?
Basically, that's got hit written all over it.
Enormous.
We've been playing it for a few weeks.
Has it been in hits already?
No, no, no.
It's not even out yet.
Has it been released?
It's not out.
The public purchases.
It's released on the 10th of April.
So you've got to wait a few weeks for that one.
Yeah, it's very soothing.
It's going to be a massive smash hit.
A massive smash-ive.
yeah just say yes yes and push on this is element joe on xfm london's 104.9 it's time to launch a text competition because we've got so much stuff to give away this text comp oh yeah we've still got what have we still got to give away well we've still got tickets for the fright fest uh week it's not really a weekender but it's a whole day of horror films at the prince charles cinema next saturday we've got laminated day passes
And that includes a preview of Eli Roth's new film Hostel, a terribly horrible film about American sexual tourist backpackers who get their just desserts when they check into a hostel.
I haven't finished writing the back of a video blurb yet.
I don't suppose it'll say American sexual tourist backpackers when the DVD does come out.
Maybe not.
Uh, so that's exciting.
They're showing lots of good stuff there.
But we'll go into that in more detail later.
What's the text competition, Adam?
Well, basically, this text competition is just an excuse for me to, uh, drop some names, or drop a name, but it's quite a massive name drop.
And it's related in a way, I was inspired to tell this story by last week's Ditties in the Dock, uh, which I won with Johnny Cash's Walk the Line.
Before we hear the story, can you tell us the, what the listeners should be thinking about in terms of their entries?
Yeah, uh, well, I will, um... Are you gonna come to that?
Yes.
No, it's in... I've sort of ruined the punchline like a complete jerk of my story because, uh, basically I had a close encounter as a youngster with Johnny Cash.
And I was reminded of this by my mum the other day, uh, who said, have you seen that film Walk the Line?
And I said, no, I have no intention of going to see that film Walk the Line.
She said, oh, it's very good.
And, um, do you remember when you met Johnny Cash?
And I said, what are you talking about, mum?
And she said, when you, uh,
Apparently, when I was 10 years old, we were in Barbados having a family holiday, exciting family holiday, and... Posh.
Posh holiday, yeah, very nice.
And one morning, I said to my mum, apparently, I've got to go down to... This sounds a little bit creepy, incidentally, this story, but I don't think you should worry because Johnny Cash is a famous and slubrious man when he was alive.
But I said, Mum, I've made a new friend and I've got to go and meet him down by the... on the beach.
And she said, really?
You've made a new friend?
What kind of friend?
And I said, he's a really nice man.
And he said that I should come down.
We're going to go on his lilo and we're going to go snorkeling.
uh... so obviously a little alarmed by that my mom followed me down to the beach came down with me and discovered that the friend i had made the previous day on the beach was johnny cash the man in black now yet this so this is when i was ten years old so that would be in nineteen eighties and thereabouts and uh... johnny cash was there with his son who was around about the same age as me so i don't know i'm not that johnny cash expert i don't know if
Obviously, if he doesn't have a son the same age as me, then my story is not going to hold much water.
But if someone could do the fact checking for me, I'd appreciate it.
Danthe, um, fact check.
But that's pretty good, isn't it?
Don't you think?
Assuming the story is true.
Assuming it's true, yeah.
I have every reason to believe it is, because my mum swears it's true.
So, we want people to text in 83XFM with very, very, very famous people they met when they were kids.
cos I remember the, I remember the bloke, I mean I don't remember obviously being impressed by him being Johnny Cash cos I wouldn't know who he was, but I remember just snorkelling with this really nice American man who was really friendly and good fun and very sort of avuncular and fatherly.
And his son who was a nice guy as well.
So famous people you met when you were tiny, who's got the best
genuine story.
How are we going to fact check these things?
I don't know.
We just got to trust people.
Yeah, if you can come up with a really good lie.
But it's got to be, it's got to be an A-list.
It's got to be an encounter with A-list.
So my Dave Prowse story wouldn't count?
Dave Prowse.
When I won that Magpie competition and went to Thames at Teddington and met Dave Prowse and Tommy Cooper and the Rainbow Team?
No, that would not count.
That's a good example of something- But he's the Green Cross Codeman and Darth Vader.
That must- I mean, that's two B-listers.
He's not A-list.
It doesn't- Two B's does not make an A. I'm sorry, we've got to be brutal about this.
It's got to be an absolute legend.
MC Hammer?
Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Laughs Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags Steve Lags
before anyone knew he was evil.
And what was he just like, Hitler with his arm around him?
It's similar, historically, to saying his amazing Tony Blair now.
In the future, they'll go, my God, you met Tony Blair, the most evil war criminal in the world.
I don't think it's exactly the same, a little bit.
But you see, the encounter with Hitler would count.
That would count, but it wasn't me, you see, it was a very ancient relative.
That's an encounter with the A-list, so we're being brutal about it.
Would you say Hitler was an A-lister?
I would say Hitler, definitely, in his time.
What sort of celebrity scale is this?
The scale of evil.
Yeah.
Anyway, so get texting now.
We want to hear about your encounters with the A-list.
It's free play time again, and here's a nugget from the 80s.
Hey, sorry, Adam, to interrupt you, but the best text, we'll call you up and get you to tell us the anecdote live on the air.
so it's important that you are able to speak.
Incidentally, Xanthi just fact-checked my story and it checks out.
John Carter is the son of Johnny... Johnny?
John Carter, right, yes, is the son of Johnny Cash, who would have been around about the same age as me at that point.
Probably still is around about the same age as me, if that was the case.
Anyway, back to the free play.
This is Flash in the Pan.
That's Flash and the Pan, not Flash in the Pan, you see.
And I think they were from Australia.
That's a song called Waiting for a Train, which was a hit in the early 80s.
It's Adam and Joe here on XFM.
Now our text competition is Encounters with the A-list.
Encounters with the A-list.
So at any time, doesn't matter.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
I thought it was specifically childhood.
Doesn't have to be childhood.
I like the fact that it was when you were so young you didn't really know the significance of the event.
That would be fine, but it's any kind of encounter with the A-list.
I don't think we should... Really?
...limit it that much.
I think we might just get, you know, I met.
Jack Black outside a Tenacious T concert.
Well, we've tried to explain the fact that that wouldn't really count.
Even though Jack Black is technically an A-lister now, I mean, we're talking about massive, legendary figures, you know what I mean?
Someone like, you know, I met Alfred Hitchcock, someone like that.
OK, listen, so Adam, I'm going to read you some of the famous names.
I'm not going to tell you the story around them.
And you've got to tell me whether you want to hear them.
Yeah, all right then.
OK.
I'm just trying to look for proper stories here.
Let me give you another example of a close encounter with the A-list that I witnessed.
Didn't really have it myself.
But this girl I was going out with, Karen, who was a waitress at this restaurant I worked at, she got to dance with Dustin Hoffman.
Because Dustin Hoffman came into the restaurant, and it was a kind of crazy annoying 50s theme restaurant that I used to work at.
I was the DJ there.
I used to play a lot of crazy annoying 50s music.
And while I was playing some of this music, Dustin Hoffman got up and started dancing with Karen, my girlfriend, on her roller skates.
And it was pretty amazing.
He was a really good dancer and he was whirling her around and dipping her and twirling her.
And obviously, I wasn't dancing Rain Man.
I don't think he does that.
He does.
He dances with Tom Cruise at the very end of the film.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
And it's sort of special dancing.
but it was brilliant though and he was so charming he left a brilliant tip there was no question of you being jealous because you just thought encounter with the a-list he is lovely he's a great guy yeah yeah i've chatted him for 20 minutes or so oh you interviewed him for your radio he was really nice yeah okay there you go so that's yeah that's an encounter with the a-list got me so okay okay so here we go this is what we've got
I'm just pausing for effect, okay?
It doesn't mean that I'm having trouble reading the texts.
You're not gonna- What about Slash from Guns and Roses?
Does he count?
But a borderline, I would say.
Do you want to hear the slash- the- the slasher-dote?
Go on then.
I spoke to Slash on the phone when I was 12, and he sent of a t-shirt.
Well, that must be me.
Yes.
It's a predictive mistake.
Oh no, the texts have refreshed.
But anyway, he sent this person a picture of himself in a swimming pool and a t-shirt.
Why, can I just go on tangentially a slightly different subject for a second?
Why does the predictive texting suggest of rather than me?
Surely me is much more useful.
How's that slash thing?
React to the slash thing?
Why was slash on the phone?
We need a bit more background than that.
Well, if you're intrigued, we can get this person on it.
That's from Farmer in Ascot.
Farmer?
Are you a farmer?
Or are you called farmer?
Here's another one.
Whilst on holiday in Tunisia, I went scuba diving with Jim Carver from the Bill.
No.
Says Chris in Croydon.
Which one's that?
Is that Sergeant Big Nose?
Don't know.
Cos he's the only A-lister in the bill, Sergeant Big Nose.
It by no means counts.
Jamie Lee Curtis.
Yes, that does count.
OK, here we go.
Emma in Edgware.
I met Jamie Lee Curtis when I was a baby.
My mum said she fell in love with me and wanted to take me home.
Wow.
That's pretty good.
That's pretty good.
That is good.
So that could be winner Patrick Swayze.
A-list?
Yeah, definitely, definitely.
Even though he's in one of those orange ads?
I don't care, he's in Roadhouse.
Okay, here we go.
Dad left me outside a toilet while he went off into the theatre.
Patrick Swayze came up to me to ask if I was okay and waited with me till Dad came back.
I was eight-ish.
Classic Swayze!
Classic Swayze story.
I bet you'd expect him to behave.
I bet that guy had the time of his life.
Ricky and Steve laugh Ricky and Steve laugh Ricky and Steve laugh
Said Amy in Camberwell.
Hello Amy in Camberwell.
Hello Camberwell as well.
I live in Camberwell.
Come on, you've got to have... Liza Minnelli.
Liza Minnelli, that certainly counts.
Yeah, I met Liza Minnelli when I was four on holiday in Venice in 1984.
Apparently, I have no memories of this.
I was in the push chair.
That's from Michael Sky.
Any good?
What about the Queen?
Is she an A-lister?
She is, but if it's like I shook hands with the Queen at a garden fete, then that's no good.
I think that's what we got there.
Jim Rockford, Dave Benson Phillips.
Dave Benson Phillips does not count.
He's A. In the world of CITV, he's A-list.
Chris Tarrant.
Tarrant doesn't really count.
Catherine Zeta-Jones.
No.
Cheggers.
Cheggers!
Come on!
Gary Glitter.
No, that's revolting and boring.
Well before he was revolting and boring.
Helen Mirren.
He was always revolting and boring.
Helen Mirren.
Borderline.
Oh man, we're not doing very well.
Angelina Jolie.
What's that encounter?
I was shopping for a new helmet in a bike warehouse.
Is this from Jay?
In Biggin Hill.
And who was there with her stunt coordinator but Angelina Jolie.
we had a brief discussion about the helmets and apart from the fact that she was very small as was your helmet probably it was completely unremarkable says Joe in Bexley that's quite a good one that's okay put Joe on the list on the shortlist okay can we get Joe on the shortlist please Xanthi right listen I think we should play some adverts and give people a bit more of a chance to get their heads together
A-list.
Come on, think A-list.
Dave Benson Phillips is not on the A-list.
All right, he should be.
Obviously, that's taken as read, but currently he's not.
Hang on, David Bowie changed my nappy.
That's good.
We've got to hear that one from A-Brown.
Let's save it.
OK, come on, we can come back to these.
We'll be back shortly.
XFM
I would have gone for a snappy ending.
They decided to go with a fade.
That was The White Stripes with my doorbell.
You're listening to Adam and Joe on XFM.
And we are going to pretty much wrap up our text competition now.
It's going to be tricky to wrap up, Adam, because the answers are kind of raining in lots of them.
Really?
Is that the right word?
Raining?
Raining's perfect.
Raining in like rain.
And listen, just before we played that record on those adverts, we were talking about somebody who'd had his nappy changed by David Bowie.
The Thin White Duke, changing the nappy.
You've done a bit of a stinky.
Woah woah, your nappy is so full of poo poo.
Do we have the man whose nappy was changed on the line?
What's his name?
He's called Aeneas Brown.
Hello, Aeneas.
Hello, Aeneas.
How you doing?
It's a brilliant name, but listen, thank you for holding on for so long and we hear you're hung over.
That was a horrible hangover, fearingly bad.
Yeah, you sound bad.
What were you doing last night?
Oh, I just went to a gig in Highgate and then just came back to my girlfriend's place.
And how do you want to be changed by David Bowie?
It's too easy.
No, no, no.
You're one of these adult babies.
For the weekly occurrence, it's just a once-in-a-lifetime experience.
So, Ineos, how do you know about this?
Well, my mum was at college with a woman who went out with him just before he became really big with Space Oddity.
Oh, yeah.
And I think he was still doing Mime at the time.
It wasn't Hermione Farthingale, was it?
I don't know.
Who's that?
Well, that's the person that he was going out with at that stage of his career.
Oh, I don't know.
Some other bint that my mum was at college with.
And then she met up with her some years later.
She hadn't seen her for a while.
And she just introduced him very
casually as this is my boyfriend David.
I think he was Hermione from Yale.
Um, and uh... David probably had lots of girlfriends in them days.
Well, I don't think we were living in some place out in the country.
And boyfriends?
My mum and her friend went out for a kind of wander in the grounds or the garden or whatever and they left me with David and apparently yes, I soiled myself in some manner I don't know what I... Because you were so excited I would imagine.
Honestly, yes.
In the presence of greatness and um...
He just, you know, being a kind of advanced specimen of the male species at the time.
That's right.
He went ahead and did the honors.
What would he have looked like so he could picture it at that point?
Did he have his big... I imagine him wearing a nappy.
You imagine him wearing a nappy?
Yes, you know, like in that sort of mind thing, you know, with his kind of eyes.
Well, he wore a nappy as the elephant man, didn't he?
But that was much later in his career when he was on the stage.
What would he have looked like, Adam, at that point?
Well, I'm not sure about the exact dates because he changed his hair quite a lot, but it would have either been a very curly mop with a kind of afghan coat that he was wearing.
Yes, very pretty.
or it could have been the cusp of the hunky-dory cover with the long flowing hair with the sort of spiky at the top and then the sort of giant mullet no just just um straight ahead lady hair he was a bit oh it would have been what an amazing thing to have happened so was your i've got millions of them i've got millions of these kind of ridiculous things before was your was your changed your nappy was your mum said that i was a bloody handsome bastard
there you go that's not bad when did he say that well you've done it now yeah well i think it's all right it's all it's classic british my girlfriend's dad wrote this last song no yeah it's gone into hiding
Has he gone into hiding?
No, he lives in Hamburg, so... Does he?
Well, that explains the whole thing.
That's amazing.
Is he a millionaire now, like the, uh... Well, he's quite rich.
He wrote, he wrote, like, the Eurovision Song Contest entries for Luxembourg, and he wrote all of Backe as hits as well, like Yes, Sir, I Can Boogie.
Really?
Can you say all of them?
Surely that was Backe as only hit.
No, they had a lead.
Sorry, I'm a lady as well.
Hey, listen, what prize would you like to win today?
Oh, can I have that pass for the horror movie?
Yeah, you can.
Brilliant.
Yeah, that's going to be a really good day.
And I think if anybody else wants to go, there are still tickets on sale.
They're showing Death Trance, which is an Asian samurai slasher.
Oh, are you?
With the actual choreography done by Ruhei Kitamura, who made Versus, Wicker Man, Mortuary, Rika, Hostel and Theater of Blood.
So that'll be great.
of blood yeah it's a new print of the old classic and yes can I just ask quickly so was your mum like a kind of arty hippie oh yeah yeah she went to the art school and Ealing yeah my mum has really got all the claims to fame she's really got like ridiculous ones does she still hang out with these types of people
No, not really, not really.
Right.
And what do you do for a living?
Sorry to say, I'm an artist.
You're an artist, I can tell.
His voice trembling.
Hey, listen, we should, because there are loads of other techs, so let me, I just want to run a couple of these by you, Adam.
Absolutely.
But thank you very much indeed for calling in.
That's a fantastic story.
And it's been a pleasure talking to you.
Have a good weekend.
Pleasure talking to you.
It's a great show, guys.
Thanks for listening.
Music's generally rubbish.
You're just great.
thanks a lot cheers there we will just leave him rambling in a kind of hungover reverie there it seems to me that our listeners are so influential and well connected that if we all gang together we could do something i don't know maybe just get pissed we could take over a tiny corner of the world yeah
so do you want to hear one or two others because we got literally millions literally millions well I'll tell you what let's let's play a little bit more music tie up the text competition introduced it is in the dark and that's the end of the show pretty much we still got 25 more minutes of excitement to go but right now here is a song by the Zutoms
That's the Zootons, the first single to be taken from their second album, which will be out in about a month or so.
And that was called Why Won't You Give Me Your Love?
Probably because you keep shouting at me in that obnoxious way.
So Joe, have you got any other...?
bits of celebrity A-list encounters there.
The sort of pick of the remaining bunch, and thank you to everybody who texted in.
This comes from, man, this is about four texts long, but I met George Lucas and the Danish king while working at the Eurostar terminal in Waterloo.
That's pretty good.
George Lucas and a king, the king of Denmark.
Even though he wouldn't count as an A-lister, but yeah, that's good.
The Danish king was very nice and refused to let me carry his bag.
Lucas was a right S**T and refused to speak to me directly and asked me to make sure nobody walked in front of him while he walked through the departure lounge.
That's from Tim in Harrow.
What was this- what was Tim doing there?
Was he working there?
He was just working at Eurostar, yeah.
Oh, right, there you go.
Bad George Lucas.
So what- he didn't speak to him directly?
Did he speak to him through the Danish King?
No, I've heard stories that Gwyneth Paltrow does that as well.
If you're- if you're Gwyneth Pol- if you're working with Gwyneth,
and she what no she just she just won't have anybody talk to her directly you have to talk to her via her assistant if even if you're standing right next to her right allegedly could you uh could you talk to a wall and have the sound bounce off the wall and then hit her you know you probably get into trouble really do you want to hear a quick that's too direct Annie Lennox won go on then i met Annie Lennox on a bridge in moscow in the freezing cold while she was promoting Greenpeace i care if her arose but the head fell off
that's kind of brilliant and kind of pathetic at the same time so for two people who don't care about celebrity as we claimed at the beginning of the show yeah we've been milking it for about 40 minutes now anyway that's the end of that text competition very enjoyable thanks to everyone who texted in and thanks a lot to NES again for his enjoyable Bowie nappy changing anecdote now it's time
It's the part of the show where myself and Joe Cornish battle it out to decide who will be the person to play the last replay of the two hours here.
And this week, it's all about John Landis movies and songs that have appeared in them.
Thanks.
Here you go.
Do you want to go first or shall I go?
Well, I think you should go first because I've got a choice of two tracks, one very stupid and one very serious.
And what I choose will depend on what you choose, Adam.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
That's not fair.
Why not?
Because you can't do that.
I'm doing it!
Oh no.
Okay, well I'm gonna go for a fairly obvious one, but it's an album that popped up on the old iPod recently and certainly enjoyed hearing it on random play.
Blues Brothers, original soundtrack.
Now, this was something that we were very into when we were teens, wasn't it?
Yeah, because it's your first port of call for non-threatening soul music, isn't it?
Non-threatening R&B.
Before you get into the proper stuff, you get into the silly stuff, which appears on the Blues Brothers soundtrack album.
And it's, you know, when I say silly, it's brilliant stuff.
It's amazing.
There's a sort of thin line between the Blues Brothers and say the Rocky Horror Picture Show, isn't there?
in terms of an easy way for students to get very drunk and have a complete look.
I would say that the music on the Blues Brothers soundtrack is considerably superior.
I would agree, but you know what I mean, it provides you with a costume, music and a themed way to drink.
Yes, absolutely.
And that's a killer combo in the world of film and entertainment.
Definitely.
Anyway, I'll cut this short.
Basically, I want you to vote for
Ray Charles singing shake a tail feather Probably the most superior version of that song which appears on the Blues Brothers original soundtrack It's amazing an absolute smash a brilliant scene as well where they go to Ray's music shop and he just launches into shake a tail feather It's a peach.
I can't really say enough good things about it
I want you to vote for Ray Charles, shake a tail feather from Blues Brothers.
Joe, what are you going for?
Yeah, we should just remind people that all five callers who get on air will win a fantastic competition out of our amazing, uh, uh, prize, I mean, out of our amazing lineup of prizes.
I'm going for something really awful.
Something so terrible.
Uh, some of our older listeners or stupider listeners might remember a John Landis film called Spies Like Us.
starring Chevy Chase and Dan Aykroyd.
Not Landis's greatest moment but quite a good 80s relic and they released a single that they hoped would chart with the theme of the movie it was called Spies Like Us and it was sung by Paul McCartney and Joey Ramone.
Was it really?
Was it really?
Was it really?
Was it really?
Was it really?
It is like someone's destroying a synthesizer with a double-barreled shotgun in Chiselhurst caves with Paul McCartney and Joey Ramone.
Big echoey drum sounds.
There's terrible chanting in it, it's appalling.
So call, no don't call, yeah call 08712221049 and vote for Spies Like Us or Shake a Tailfeather.
All five callers who get on air will win a fantastic prize.
Please call now!
is XFM.
This is XFM.
XFM.
Come on, they've got enough royalties already.
Shall I tell you the end?
of what of this song yeah well basically it goes it's the same and then it ends does it yeah brilliant that's how it ends but it's cold play it's a really good ending so if i spoil the ending for anyone who hasn't heard that before kodgeplodge come on i like them
I like the mighty Coldplay and I think that's a fine song and we're only fading out a bit early because we've got to resolve Ditties in the Dark.
Yes indeed.
This week it is a battle royale between Ray Charles with Shaker Tailfeather and Paul McCartney with Spies Like Us, the unifying element being they're both songs used in John Landis films.
Yeah.
Here we go.
We've got Heather on the line.
Hello, Heather.
Hi.
How are you doing?
I'm good, thank you.
I'm back for my weekly dose of mockery.
Have we spoken to you before, have we?
Quite a few times.
And what defines you in our minds, Heather?
What is it that you do?
Er, what is it that I do?
Yeah.
Erm, well, I'm a graphic design student, but I don't think he knew that before.
Oh, we're finding out more about that.
I think Heather's just got a very sexy voice.
I think that's what defines her in our minds.
Yes.
And every time she calls in, she's at a differing level of sexiness.
Sometimes gravelly, sometimes just tired from exhausting night.
Playfully perky.
Playfully perky, yeah.
This is, this is Heather, you know, wide awake.
So Heather, what are you voting for?
Is it, is it going to be shake a tail feather or spies like us?
spies like us.
You fool!
You lunatic.
How come we told you it's the worst song ever recorded?
She was seduced by your pitch.
I know, I don't want to hear it.
Have you seen that film?
No, I haven't.
It's got some funny bits.
It's a very funny bit where Chevy Chase cheats in a spy exam at the beginning.
And he's got all the stuff written on the inside of his glasses and stuff.
It's quite good.
Heather, I love you for so many reasons.
Now, thanks for calling.
What prize would you like?
Would you like this life on account of the fact that you're a girl?
I watched this live all this week, it was fantastic.
That would be great, I love it.
Okay, copy this live to Heather please, Xanthe.
Thanks very much for your call Heather, have a great weekend.
Joe, how you doing, are you there?
Hello, I'm fine, thank you.
Good, what are you up to this weekend?
Not a lot, nothing in fact.
Go into more detail.
Just going to have a bit of a veg out weekend I think.
What, broccoli, carrots?
Yeah, broccoli, bit of carrots, five a day.
Sounds good man, I like broccoli.
What are you going to be watching on telly tonight then, Joe?
Um, I don't know.
Juice Bigelow I've just got out, so I'm upset.
Oh, well done.
Well, that's going to be quite a challenging evening.
Have you never seen Juice Bigelow?
No, I haven't.
It's not bad.
It's good.
Lower your expectations to the floor and you'll be pleasantly surprised.
It's alright.
Wonderful, I should do that.
What are you voting for, Joe?
Is it going to be shake a tail, feather or something like that?
I'd like to shake my tail feather.
Hey, well done.
Very democratic.
It is an amazingly powerful blast of soul power from the mighty Ray Charles.
Thank you very much indeed for your call, Joe.
Hey, what prize, Joe, would you like?
Maybe because you're a bloke ghost in the shell on DVD.
Yes, sounds wonderful.
There you go.
There we go.
Thanks for calling, Joe.
Hello, Rory.
Hello.
Hello, Rory.
Hi, guys.
You sound slightly fed up with yourself and us.
I'm not fed up in the slightest.
Aren't you good?
Very good.
And I'm very well, thank you.
What are you up to today?
What are you going to be doing for the rest of the day?
I'm currently just doing some Japanese homework.
Japanese homework.
Konnichiwa.
Are you some kind of... Oh, man.
How many words did we know when we were in Japan, Adam?
Adam and I learnt about 10 words of Japan when we were there.
That was impressive.
I wish I could remember one.
Joe desu.
Adam desu.
Ghenki desu ka.
Ghenki desu ka.
Yeah, man.
I love Japan and Japanese.
Well done.
That must be fun.
Yeah, yeah, definitely.
Have you been to Japan?
Yeah, yeah, I went about a year and a half ago.
I want to go back again for a year as part of my university.
You're a lucky man.
So what are you voting for?
I'm going to vote for Spies Like Us.
You're a lunatic.
You can go back to Japan for all I care, Rory.
I love our listeners.
2-1 to the worst theme tune ever recorded.
It's going to sound so good on XFM as well.
Would you like Ghost in the Shell or This Life?
Um, I'll go with, uh, Ghost in the Shell.
Okay.
I'm afraid not.
We gave those away earlier, um, to our David Bowie nappy man.
Okay.
Ghost in the Shell.
Sorry about that, Rory.
On its way to you.
Thanks a lot for your call, Rory.
Okay, we'd better speed this up now.
Greg, are you there?
Greg?
Hello?
Hello, Greg.
Yes.
Are you alright?
Are you on some sort of medication?
Um, no, no, no.
No, you're using some sort of a funny voice though, Greg.
You sound, Greg, you sound dangerously like a man who's just about to say a four letter word.
You sound dangerously.
I'm sorry.
Sorry to disappoint you now.
Okay, cool.
I'm just so into this competition.
Okay, you're a cool customer.
Hey, you're gonna vote for spies like us, please.
Aren't you?
I'm sorry.
Why would anyone in their right mind do that?
Yeah, exactly.
Because you're American and you enjoy pop culture.
You might be Canadian.
Canadian, yeah, whatever.
Well, you see, I actually couldn't be bothered to text in, but I was going to text in a Ray Charles story.
and uh and so i have to vote for a charles okay fantastic you know who you sound like greg is um what's he called we had him in celebrity regression the other day you know the guy from willard uh what's his name oh crispin glover crispin glover yeah come on we got four minutes we got a race thanks so much for calling me greg so that's what is that to all that's to all that's amazing this is a brilliant edition of digits in the doc so paul are you there
Yes, I am.
So you realise this is one of the most important votes since a very important vote, the last one.
Hello?
I'm- I'm- I'm so chuffed that I'm gonna make the decision.
Now Paul, what we want you to do, okay, is we want you to say the following words.
I am going to vote for, and then pause, count to five in your head, and then tell us what you're gonna vote for.
It's all about the pause, it's all about the suspense.
Go.
Okay.
Go.
Okay guys, I'm going to vote for... Some lovely tat to end the show.
To spies like her.
Yay!
I love you, Paul!
Thank you very much indeed.
What a clever man.
Our listeners are brilliant.
The worst song ever recorded.
You can't argue with a Beatle and a Ramone.
Well, unless they're doing this.
Thanks very much for your call, Paul.
Thanks to everyone who called in.
We'll leave you with this terrible, terrible night.
Thank you, Jesus.
We'll see you next week.
Bye-bye!
There's the beautiful people at the spotlight
No one else can dance like me So what's all of us?
Ain't nobody got spine like her What do you say?
No one else can look that way So what's all of us?
XSX